Vietnam Day 4 & 5 - Ha Long Bay, Hanoi to Hue on the Sleeper Train

The hat and beard caused quite a stir amongst the village.

We were miraculously the first guests up and about for a coffee the next morning. We later found out that the older Brit couple (Harvey and G) had gotten drunk, then stoned up on the deck (apparently an old lady gave them some marijuana for free up in Sapa as she only uses the stem of the plant and usually throws it away!), and locked themselves out of their room until about 3am! They looked a bit ropey over our 5 courses of breakfast.

That morning we were on our way to a floating village nearby for a look around and to find out about their lives (or, more likely buy something from their floating gift-shop). At around 11am – we arrived and downed anchor. Soon, there was a fleet of ladies stand-up-rowing out to us in little boats. We all got in them in couples and set of for the village. Our lady gave us conical hats to wear for the trip and also didn’t insist on our life jackets (unlike everyone else’s escourt) so we were the coolest kids on the water. She was very nice – but spoke no English. All the ladies were chatting amongst themselves and laughing – presumably about the spectacle of us all, or whether they’d ended up with the fatties on board.

Our taxi service.

It took 15 minutes or so to reach the town – we all got off an were treated to some local Tea, and a brief history of the village. Apparently – they live out there, in their modest but fairly large houses (two or three bedroom shacks with a  kitchen and front deck) all their lives, the women weave and cook – the men fish. The big ones – they sell, the smaller ones they keep in fish-farms attached to their houses until they are big enough to generate more cash at the markets. Apparently a good sized fish with get you 25,000d – or about $1.25 – and it takes them 3 or 4 hours to make it to the mainland.

Floating dogs - there was a cat a few houses over, across the water
which must've driven them crazy.

There is a population of over 1200 in villages across Ha Long Bay, but only about 60 or so in ours. When the kids get to a certain age (15 and up) they are married off – sometimes the girls to a completely new village to promote a bit of genetic diversity. We saw a school which the tour company helped build (in return for access to the village), and a couple of houses on the inside – plus one of the fish farms and (as suspected) the gift shop. It was all tat, but one German woman paid $15 (300,000d) for a small picture which made the whole boat feel like they got off the hook and we slipped out of there.

Woooooooo!!

Then we got picked up by our boat ladies again for a tour of the village where we were stared at by the locals who looked like they saw a boat load of people a day and were pretty unimpressed by the whole situation. After being whisked back to our boat and tipping our driver/rower (some tight bastards didn’t – naming no names but it was just the Germans) we were underway again. After a brief stop for a jump off the boat and swim in the ocean (massive current so it was more like punishment than enjoyment so you didn’t drift away!) we were off again.

As the sun was setting again, we dropped anchor in a popular spot and headed out for more kayaking – this time for a longer venture, Tom reckoned 90 minutes. Everything went fine on the way there – again it was very picturesque and the going was easy, we stopped at a beach after 45 minutes or so for a break and some pictures. On the way back, we were the last ones to leave and as I was going solo with the rowing – never caught up to the pack. It got dark really quickly, and although we never really felt in danger – it was a massive struggle getting back. We soon discovered that we were heading into the current for most of it, and at one point started getting dragged out towards the open waters. We thought we’d caught up and made it back at one point – and were lining up to get back on the boat when I noticed I recognized none of the faces and we were in fact, at the wrong boat! In my defence it was now pitch black, and we were at the Dragon’s Pearl I – an identical boat.

Clearly a pro.

Kings of Kayak.

Unfortunately ours was still another 20 minute paddle up-current, by the time we arrived I was exhausted and the metal plate on my collarbone ached like the day I had it screwed in there. Everyone else had only just got aboard and was equally traumatised  - especially Harvey and G who apparently had a huge verbal slinging match at eachother, with their swearing echoing through the bay and making all the crews around laugh – we could relate from previous kayak trips. At least this time, it was just me rowing so we made it through ok…

The final night was again great food, toasts and speeches from the captain and chefs and even a cake. We drank too much and stayed up too late – keen to drag it out as long as possible as we knew tomorrow we’d be back on dry land, back in a bus, and onto a train…

Our final morning on the boat just consisted of an early breakfast and packing as we headed back to the port. Lunch was uncomfortably early at 10:45am but we ate as much as we could, knowing we had a long day of travels ahead.

Worth the back-breaking paddle.

After more speeches from the Captain and Tom we were disembarking. It was suggested that if we enjoyed our service we should give a tip to the captain on the way out – despite my initial thoughts of “take it from the $500+ we spent over three days” and making a break for it we paid up. I let Lisa do it, but she had the money in the wrong hand so when the Captain went to shake it – she ended up slipping him the note like it was a drug deal – I laughed all the way back to the bus!

Boarding the bus we immediately noticed that customer service had now gone out of the window. We’d already filled out our customer satisfaction sheets so they couldn’t really care less. Our driver was worse than on the way in – the bus was older and less comfortable and took longer. To top it off, when we got back to Hanoi – we were the last ones to be dropped off and they messed up the location so he tried to kick us out on the other side of town. After insisting he took us to the train station and not budging, he made a phone call and begrudgingly took us with a sour look on his face.

We were over 2 hours early for our train – and after speaking to four or five people at the station finally found out where to go come 6:30pm, so headed to the nearest bar we could see and had some dutch-courage drinks in prepararion for our 15 hour sleeper train ride. On arrival back at the station, one of the guys I’d spoken to ushered us to our seats – looked at our tickets and told us to wait. He looked like he worked there, so we followed him. Five minutes later, he rushed back and before we knew it had picked up all 40kg or so of our backpacks and was skipping through the station with them towards the trains! An impressive feat from a guy in his 50s weighing about the same as our luggage.

Final night centrepiece - made from
 watermelon and carrot.

We flashed our tickets and ran after him, struggling to keep up. At this point, it dawned on us that this was probably going to cost us some money – it was Bali airport all over again! We walked briskly for 5 minutes or so, following him and hoping he at least knew where he was going! He took us to our carriage and found our cabin, it all seemed to match the tickets and he placed our bags down. I went to hand him 50,000d and he immediately saw the note and said “no – 500, 500! ($25) ”. Fortunately, now savvy in such matters I stood my ground and ended up agreeing on 100,000 – but gave him 150,000 as he amused us.

After a stock up on beers and snacks from the ladies outside on the platform we were off. The cabin itself left a lot to be desired. The beds were like concrete, with damp on the walls and underside of the top bunks. We did at laest have the bottom ones – which come with a table in between and you can sit up and chat – and move around pretty easily. There was a Spanish couple in their 50s sharing with us who looked soul-destroyed when we showed up and claimed our bunks, especially as they had friends in the next cabins. They were up and about for the first hour or so, we were just chatting away having our dinner (baguette with laughing cow cheese and crisps!). Soon, the train stopped in at a few more stations picking up more and more locals – only the regular seated carriages were too full so they were being put on ours, given small plastic seats and put in the corridor right outside the room! At one point this guy was stood in the doorway just staring at Lisa for a good 5 minutes – then me – then Lisa again, until I finally said something sarcastic to him but it didn’t help.

My glorious view for 15 hours...

Then – without warning one of the staff just came into our room and sat on the end of Lisa’s bunk – pretty much on her feet, whipped his phone out and called his girlfriend! It lasted five minutes or so, complete luvvy-wuvvy smooches and all – then another five minutes playing a game on it before he finished his break and left! We just sat there amazed.

After another half-hour or so, fortunately the other couple got tired and went to sleep – so we could close and lock the door.

Neither of us really got much sleep – the sporadic motion and noise of the train, the frequent stopping and shouting outside the room, and the prison cell beds all contributed to reaching our destination feeling thoroughly shitty… but, we made it!